Thursday, November 26, 2009

November 25

Yesterday I didn’t cry at all. Not that I felt good, just numb and disconnected. I thought I might be able to make it through today too (not that it really matters), but I didn’t. I’ve come to realize the power of an embrace. You can really tell if someone is sincere and expressing their love.  I have as of yet been unable to keep a lid on any stewing emotions when faced with such an embrace. It is such a comforting experience that it knocks my guard down in an instant, as it were nothing more than a piece of paper blown over by the wind.  And then, I cry. Every time. And I know its ok to cry. Maybe its like I told you about skiing, that every time you fall you get a little better, or, every tear I’m crying brings me closer to some sort of understanding or acceptance. Here’s hoping.

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